An Answer to the Avengers

The idea for The Avengers is a cool one. Take a handful of previously established characters and put them together in one film, or originally a comic book. But what if we took that a step further and created an ultimate hero movie? Here is the W^M team… even though the plot to this movie would probably be really stupid.

-Wolverine- X-Men Origins: Wolverine

He still has his memory at this point and by the size of him I would think he isn’t yet on his beef jerky and whiskey diet. Plus Hugh Jackman’s Wolverine is smart, believable and bad ass. Wolverine would be at the front line of whatever situation called for this ridiculous collection of fictional characters.

-Ethan Hunt- Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol

The latest appearance of Ethan Hunt is wiser and even more daring than in the other films. He has the composure to handle surveillance situations and don’t count him out in hand to hand combat. Then there's Tom Cruise, who is on the top of his game. So his presence wouldn’t hurt a film like this, which would likely need a $1 billion budget.

-Tommy Oliver- Power Rangers: The Movie

He was just a troubled new kid in town when Alpha 5 recruited “a team of teenagers with attitude,” but by the time Power Rangers: The Movie came around; the guy knew what he was doing. There needs to be a good balance of actual humans on this team so Tommy, who did time as the green, white, red and black Power Rangers seems the perfect fit. Jason David Frank isn’t much of an actor, but the character's leadership and martial arts skills make up for that.

-Harry Potter- Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II

I considered the aurors and the professors, but in the eighth film Harry proves that he actually is pretty awesome. Imagine if the villains of our film aren’t wizards. Harry would own the fight. He also doesn’t have a problem stepping back and taking orders. People have been telling him he’s the chosen one since he was 11. So he knows how to handle pressure.

-Batman- Batman Begins

He’s less raspy than in The Dark Knight and less arrogant. The guy isn’t really a team player, easily gets discouraged and relies heavily on gadgets that his wealth buys him. But he is good with technology. When he doesn’t know, he asks Morgan Freeman, so he is always ready with tanks, weapons, capes. Imagine Bruce Wayne outfitting Harry Potter with the awesome cape that makes it like your flying!

Legolas- Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

Another follower, imagine him and Wolverine counting off their kills like the character does with Gimli throughout the LOTR trilogy. To this day, I have never seen another character kill a bunch of guys, then kill a giant elephant and ride down the trunk of its dying carcass.

Selene- Underworld: Awakening

She kills so many bad guys throughout the Underworld films, it's crazy. With an unnaturally long life filled with constant battles, she has the experience only Wolverine and the not-yet-mentioned team leader does.

Yoda- Star Wars: Episode II- Attack of the Clones

He hasn’t become all depressed yet because his colleagues aren’t murdered until the next movie. So Yoda is still the ultimate leader for the ultimate team. Plus his lightsaber skills are some of the best around.

Eat your heart out Avengers.

Who is on your ultimate hero team?

The Sequel Dilemma

For my reviewing method, the box office success or the potential of it has little impact. This seems like a no brainer. Money doesn’t always equal quality. Money does however equal expansion. I am constantly met with the following scenario. A highly anticipated film ends with a cliff hanger. I instantly think to what the sequel may include. Three days later the movie is deemed a flop and that’s it. Cut the budget, cut characters, anything! But no, it’s too late. This weekend three films opened, all expected to flop. Sorry Disney, but I'm glad you had the decency to end John Carter at a good point and not leave the audience hanging. (Keep an eye out for the W^M review of the film.)

While the horror film Silent House and Eddie Murphy’s A Thousand Words would be long shots for sequels, it’s clear that studios will turn anything into a sequel for a chance at replicating success. How many Saw movies were there? I saw none of them, (I have a self-imposed ban on horror movies) but apparently somebody did. Three Paranormal Activity movies, a third Hangover is coming to life and nobody will leave Kristen Wiig alone regarding a Bridesmaids sequel. I’m not here to complain that there are no original movies out there. I love franchises, but taking some power out of the hands of the studios would go a long way in quelling the cliff-hanger dilemma.

Imagine if Peter Jackson had made the Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring without a financial commitment for the other films. Or if Warner Bros. dropped Harry Potter after Chamber of Secrets didn’t meet expectations. Both seem unthinkable with their overwhelming success and quality. But when studios are unwilling to commit to a franchise we get situations like The Golden Compass, an overly simplified version of the source book, which is dependent on sequels that never came.

Studios are understandably concerned with costs, and it would be unrealistic to think that box office receipts would not be the final call regarding sequels. So here is an open call to all independently wealthy people. I will make the unwanted sequels to all your favorite movies… if you pay. Do you think I can get Matthew Broderick and Hank Azaria to star in my Godzilla sequel?